If Breastfeeding is Natural, Why is it So Hard?

Picture this: you’re a new mum, holding your beautiful newborn, when she starts to stir, her tiny fingers brushing her cheek as she begins to search for your breast. Remembering your antenatal class, you recognize this as an early hunger cue, so you bring her close, helping her latch on comfortably. You snap a quick photo of this loving moment and text it to your partner with the caption, “Bliss…” Sound familiar? No? It didn’t for me, either.

You’re not alone. In fact, 92% of mothers with a three-day-old baby report experiencing at least one breastfeeding issue—and this is true globally. Yet, in some parts of the world, like the remote Himba villages in Namibia, 98% of mothers are still breastfeeding by the time their child is one year old [1]. In the UK, by contrast, that figure drops to just 0.5%.

So, if breastfeeding is indeed a natural part of human life (and was essential to humanity’s survival until only a century or so ago), why is it so challenging? The answer lies in understanding that breastfeeding, while natural, is also a learned skill. Imagine, instead of breastfeeding, we were talking about walking. Walking is universal, natural—and very much a learned behavior. When a baby takes those first wobbly steps, we cheer, “He walked!” We don’t look at his fall and dismissively say, “He couldn’t do it.”

Mastering breastfeeding is similar. It doesn’t happen immediately; success comes with time, patience, and support. In cultures where breastfeeding remains common, new mums are guided by the experienced women around them—mothers, sisters, aunts—who share their own stories, normalize the challenges, and provide practical help. This kind of support boosts a new mum’s confidence, helping her overcome the initial hurdles and build perseverance.

But in places like the UK, support often looks very different. Most of us don’t live with extended family, and with low breastfeeding rates, it’s hard to find guidance from others in our “village.” Instead, well-meaning friends or family might suggest, “If breastfeeding is hard, why not try formula?” This suggestion, though kindly meant, can undermine the mother’s confidence and sense of ability during a fragile time.

That’s where lactation consultants like me come in. Every day, I have the privilege of supporting mums on their breastfeeding journey, offering practical advice and encouragement to help make breastfeeding feel less overwhelming and more rewarding. Like learning to ride a bike, it may feel wobbly at first, but with support, it becomes a joyful, natural skill.

If you’re still finding your way and want a warm, supportive guide to help you take those first “steps,” please reach out—I’d be delighted to walk alongside you on this journey.

[1] Erin A. Wagner, Caroline J. Chantry, Kathryn G. Dewey, and Laurie A. Nommsen-Rivers. October 2013